


maybe there's no perfect happy ending but we're perfect in our own way

by Dienael



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: M/M, as in "in fact it is not perfectly fine but it will be", everything is fine type of fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 04:23:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6314950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dienael/pseuds/Dienael
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is time where Neil thinks everything might not be fine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	maybe there's no perfect happy ending but we're perfect in our own way

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah well I just came back from the journey that was this books and I must admit that after pulling a one-nighter I maaaaay not be the most striking author. But here is my two cent at Andreil hell because I love them all too much for my wellbeing.
> 
> You can contact me at dienael.tumblr.com if you want to cry about the fact that a fourth book centered on the foxes being the foxes and the next year match against the trojans would be the best thing ever (or anything else, really, because woh I think I fell in love hard with this books.) ANYWAY. Have a nice reading !

There is time where he thinks everything might not be fine. It's everywhere in the words he says and in the words that he doesn't, everywhere in the cautious space he leaves between him and everyone, the precious space he doesn't close because he doesn't know how to yet. Some nights, when he can't sleep, it's everywhere in the dark and in the name he doesn't want to call, everywhere between their body when he thinks about the void he can't bring himself to cross. Sometimes he thinks he cannot heal, when he wakes up, panting, a smear of blood behind his eyelids, sometimes he thinks about the Butcher, he thinks he cannot stay, he wonders what he did to deserve his home today. Knuckles pressed against his lips, Neil sometimes thinks he is a lost cause.

Eventually, this is just moments, glimpses of a past that scarred him for too long. He isn't afraid when Andrew shoves him into a wall, hands too light to afraid him and too heavy to let him run, he isn't scared when he looks at him, smiling from the grumpy stare Andrew returns before rolling his eyes and kissing « that fucking smile » away. He doesn't startle anymore when Matt calls him a friend and he even calls Nicky his friends too one night, like it is nothing too important. He doesn't stop to listen to the delighted squeal that escape the lips of the man and smiles to Renee who shakes her head a knowing look on her face. He isn't frightened anymore by the thought of loving them all, by the mere idea of having a family for the first time.

There is a rest of tension between his shoulderblades sometimes, a subtle change in his expression and everybody ignore it because they know he handles it just fine and they know better than pushing him. When the tension settles for a too long time he can feel Andrew's hands on him. It's not blatant but they are here and if Andrew hates the idea that someone could touch him, he doesn't seem able to keep his hands off Neil because it's their way to show the other that the world sucks but they can make it better, because Andrew loves touching Neil, because Neil leans on his hands, everytime. He lets his fingers wandering on the small of his back or reaches for his hair, he pinches his shoulder or bumps into him shamelessly. That doesn't matter, he doesn't mind. It's just a way to remind Neil that he's here and that there is a lot of more interesting reasons to be nervous than some ghosts from the past.

Andrew shouldn't care but Neil laughs softly everytime.  
Strangely enough, _that_ matters.


End file.
